


Epiph-Eddie

by LovelyLittleGrim



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Desire, Eddie wants buck, M/M, Pre-Relationship, eddie has a Sudden realization
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 03:10:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20499899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyLittleGrim/pseuds/LovelyLittleGrim
Summary: Eddie's hit with a sudden thought and doesn't know what to do with it.





	Epiph-Eddie

Sometimes things hit you, in a metaphorical way, when you least expect them to.

Imagine being in the middle of some menial task, mind wandering, hands busy, and then just out of nowhere, you have this thought. Outlandish and verging on profane, and it comes entirely from left field and smacks you in the face with its presence. And it just... sticks there, waving its little hands in your eyes, screaming _notice me, overthink about me, let me drive you crazy..._

Eddie has one of those thoughts now—or to be technical, he had one of those thoughts three hours ago and it’s still clinging to him with its tiny little claws and no matter how much he tries to brush it away it stays put. He doesn’t know what to do with it. He_ wants_ to ignore it, shove it back into the recesses of his mind and just move on with his life but he knows that’s impossible now. He had the thought. So, there’s nothing left to do but own it, right?

He swallows heavily and tries to bring his attention back to what he’s doing with his hands, they’ve been still for far too long for someone who’s supposed to be cleaning a whole ass fire truck. He blinks rapidly, the haze over his eyes shifting away and bringing him face to face with his reflection. He frowns and watches the mouth of his reflection twist down. 

It’s dangerous to get lost in thought as he has been. His work is dangerous and if he fucks up people can die. He could die. His friends could die. 

He lifts his head slightly, eyes trailing to the side where he can see Buck scrubbing at some mud stuck to one of the hubcaps. He watches Buck for a long moment, takes in his hunched shoulders and his look of absolute concentration. Eddie has to bite back a grin when Buck huffs out a little breath in irritation and scrubs even harder. It makes Eddie want to tease him.

The thought pushes at him again and he clenches his jaw. 

Earlier, when the thought had first staggered out of the pits of his mind, Eddie had been in the middle of a conversation with Buck. They had been talking about surprising Christopher for his birthday with a pair of tickets to see Muppets on ice, because for some reason his kid loves those creepy little puppets.

Buck’s face had been so excited as he talked, hands moving like he couldn’t contain them as he explained all the gifts he’d already bought even though Christopher’s birthday was still over a month away. It was just so endearing to see someone else so invested in his son’s happiness. The wave of fondness for Buck just sort of crashed over him, which wasn’t all that unfamiliar, but there was something new that came with it. _The thought. _

The one that’s still scratching at him, wanting to know what kissing Buck would be like.

Eddie breathes out heavily through his nose, his breath fogging the metal. His interest in men isn’t new. He’d been with a few, but they had mostly been drunken fumbles, names forgotten and faces all a blur now. He’d never gotten a chance to know any of them the way he knows Buck, and he damn sure has never introduced any of his conquests to his son or family.

Eddie hasn’t thought this way about anyone in a long time. Not since Shannon. He’d assumed that he wouldn’t get the chance to think about anyone like that. He works long hours in a dangerous job, and he has a kid with needs that will always be his number one priority. He doesn’t have time to date or fantasize or battle strange urges that want him to kiss his coworkers. 

And yet... 

He glances over at Buck again and startles when he finds Buck staring right back, a single brow raised. Eddie can’t help but notice how the arch of it seems to highlight the angel’s kiss.

“You okay, man?” He asks Eddie, voice loud enough to reach him but not loud enough to carry to the balcony area where the others are. “You look, I don’t know, weird, I guess.”

Eddie shakes his head. “I’m fine.”

Buck scoffs, head rolling to the side.

“Come on, Diaz, you’ve been cleaning that same spot for like an hour now, it’s as clean as it’s ever going to be.” He fixes Eddie with a look that’s edging on concerned. “Seriously, is something up? Everything okay with Christopher?” 

The question makes Eddie’s heart squeeze painfully in the confines of his chest. He’s never had anyone but family worry about his kid as much as he does. It’s weird and more than a little touching. He doesn’t know how to deal with it.

“No, yeah, he’s fine,” Eddie says quickly when Buck starts to look worried. “He’s at his Tia’s today, probably having a blast.”

The tense set of Buck’s shoulders eases, relief and fondness bleed into his expression. “Good,” he says seriously, standing up and stretching his arms high over his head, “Good, he deserves some fun after studying so hard for that math test.” 

Buck pauses, arms still high in the air and looks at Eddie curiously. “How’d he do on it by the way?” 

Eddie stares up at Buck for a long moment, before pulling his gaze away and standing up himself. He pretends to busy himself with cleaning supplies. “He aced it.” 

He can’t see Buck’s face because he’s not looking but he can feel the proud smile all the same. 

“I knew he would! That kids a little genius,” Buck crows, and then there are hands gripping Eddie’s shoulders and squeezing gently. “You’re a lucky guy, you know.”

Eddie smiles to himself and tries not to focus on the warmth that bleeds through his shirt and soaks into his skin from Buck’s hands. He knows he’s lucky. His kid is amazing, full of life and laughter. Eddie has never loved another human being as much as he loves his son. He doubt’s he ever will.

“Thanks, Buck,” Eddie murmurs, tipping his head to the side to catch Buck’s eyes.

Buck squeezes his shoulder’s again and then lets his hands drag down the blades before falling away. “Don’t thank me, man, I’m just being honest.”

Eddie knows that too. It’s written all over Buck’s face. He really does care about Eddie’s son, and he really does think Eddie is lucky. And that… that makes Eddie’s heart throb a little too.

“Do you want kids, Buck?” The question just comes tumbling out of his mouth. 

“Uh,” he looks caught off guard as he leans against the truck, arm’s crossing over his chest, “I like kids, but I’ve never really thought about having my own.” 

He gives a little laugh, almost self-deprecating. “Before dating Abby, I wasn’t really the settling down type, you know? I was kind of a dirtbag and the whole…The whole kids, spouse, picket fence life wasn’t for me.” 

“And, after dating her?” Eddie asks, voice nonchalant.

“We never really talked about it when we were together, but...” Buck looks away, one boot scuffing at the ground. “I’ve been thinking about it more lately.” 

Eddie can see a flush rising from under Buck’s shirt, climbing up the length of his neck and staining the tip of his right ear. 

Buck clears his throat loudly and changes the subject. “So, gonna tell me what was bugging you or are you going to try and distract me again, Diaz?”

“Caught that, did you?” Eddie teases, despite it not having been a tactical move on his part but more of a sudden need to know. 

“Nothing gets past me,” Buck says turning back to look at him, goofy smile on his face. 

Eddie thinks about his sudden need to kiss Buck, to date him, to enfold him into his and Christopher’s life completely, and says, wryly, “Sure, Buckley.”

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like there will probably be a part two... mostly because I need them to kiss and be happy and stupidly in love with one another.


End file.
